Tower and Town, November 2020

  (view the full edition)

The Biggest Apple In The World

Once upon a time, in a land far away, a tall handsome man and a pretty petite lady were walking along by a canal. They had not got very far when they met an elderly lady carrying a very large apple too big to fit into her coat pockets. “Where did you get that huge apple ? “ the couple enquired. “ Further along the canal at the cottage by the lock” she replied. “There are more there if you are interested”.

The couple were indeed interested – so much so that they continued beyond their planned destination in order to visit the cottage. When they got there they found three very big apples beside a notice saying “Free apples”. They debated how many of the apples they could reasonably take and decided that it would be greedy to take three but acceptable to take two.

Each carrying an apple, they set off the way they had come and had not gone far when they met a family coming towards them. “What big apples those are” they remarked. “Where did you get them ? “. “They came from the cottage by the lock further along” the couple said. “There was a third apple which might still be there”. The family increased their pace but the fate of the remaining apple is not known.

The couple dined on stewed apple ( Grenadier variety ) for several days to come.

[Ed: Although dressed up as a Fairy Story, this piece describes actual events on the towpath of the Kennet and Avon Canal near Great Bedwyn on 26 September, 2020. ]

Jonathan Hinks