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Tower and Town, March 2018

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What Your Pets Write In Their Diaries

Excerpts from a Dog's Diary....

8amDog food! My favourite thing!
9.30amA car ride! My favourite thing!
9.40amA walk in the park! My favourite thing!
10.30amGot stroked and petted! My favourite thing!
12 noonLunch! My favourite thing!
1pmPlayed in the garden! My favourite thing!
3pmWagged my tail! My favourite thing!
5pmMilk-Bones! My favourite thing!
7pmGot to play ball! My favourite thing!
8pmWatched TV with the people! My favourite thing!
11pmSleeping on the bed! My favourite thing!

Excerpts from a Cat's Diary...

Day 983 of my captivity...

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream to escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.

Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am.

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies'. I must learn what this means and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow...but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now ... !

      

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